Memo #22

How We Increased Conversion Rate by 20% With a Smart Copy Hack


Often it’s not what you say, but how you say it that convinces people. In this memo, I’ll show you a smart copywriting trick that can improve your conversion rates by 20%!

Advertising is both an art and a science. It is an art because you must consider aesthetics and understand how the creative will be perceived by people, whereas its science component comes from dealing with data that drives our decision making.

However, there are moments, where the two forces intersect. Recently, we began to ask ourselves how to increase the conversion rates of a landing page for a new customer of ours.

The challenge was that the page already had most of the visual elements that are essential for conversion - eye-catching design with videos, images, reviews and even a floating "add to cart" button - so we had to experiment.

After brainstorming ideas with the AdKings team members, we came to an interesting solution: we can increase an audience’s engagement rate by making the content more personally relevant and increasing intrigue for the product by how it’s framed.

So we decided to run with this idea as an experiment and see if we could learn something to help inform our future work.

The Experiment

Any good experiment needs a hypothesis to be proved or disproved, so we came up with the following:

HYPOTHESIS - If you frame your section headlines as questions on the landing page copy, users will get more engaged and start thinking about the product in their lives.

In order to test this claim, we arranged an A/B test on Google Optimize for 17 days. This allowed us to show the two versions of the copy to 30,443 people and see which one of them performed better.


The changes were subtle, but here’s an example of how headlines were changed:

Original copy "A" vs Changed copy "B"

[Nonexistent headline before a bullet point list of product characteristics]
"Why is [BRAND] better?"


"What is in it?"


"What you might like"
"Want even better [thing the brand’s products can help with e.g. hair, eyelashes, etc]?"


Before even looking at the results properly, it’s worth discussing this last proposed change. Given that it is a good example of how a slight linguistic change can affect a product’s interpretation.

Intuitively, changing the headlines into questions makes sense as a way of helping the target audience engage with the product.

Instead of a glum "What you might like" headline for a featured products section, which sounds impersonal and seems like a random selection of items, the alternative excites the customer.

In addition, it pushes people to consider more add-on purchases, that they might not have even looked at otherwise.

As such, not only can phrasing help in creating more engaging content, but it can also completely reframe how your target audience perceives the content.

But before we go speculating, let’s look at the data.

The Results

There’s hardly any reason to discuss the results in any major depth - the numbers fell squarely on the side of our modified version.

In fact, it was such a clear improvement that there wasn’t a single day where the numbers overlapped.

Google gave us a 97% probability of the new copy outperforming the original version every single time it was used. In statistics, this is a VERY high confidence interval.

Unsurprisingly, over the course of our experiment, the average session value rose by 17%, which goes to show the benefit of creating intrigue in your potential users.


What you say is as important as how you say it when it comes to the art of persuasion.

Yet, marketers often spend too much time figuring out the content of their pitch and to whom to say it, instead of finding the right way to frame their content.

This experiment we ran is proof positive of the importance of choosing your words correctly for a creative, or landing page. Slight variations in tone can lead to considerable changes in conversion rates.

Your goal as a marketer is to excite your potential audience about your product through every tool in the toolbox.

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